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Of course you are faster
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Mostly directed at the vets, but open to anyone, if you have a good water cooler story, go for it.

This one just popped into my head yesterday, I'd almost forgot about it, but it came right back.

On a Sub, it's always good to have two doors between you and the water. One to keep the water out of the people tank, and one incase the first one craps out on you. They are called "escape trunks" as we were supposed to be able to enter the trunk, flood it down, open the hatch and swim out (only congresspersons and mothers believe that tripe). What helps is that if the first hatch is leaking, there are bilge level indicators that will let the crew know that water is building up in the trunk.

So, we go out to sea, and about a week out, we get the forward escape trunk bilge alarm. A-gang drains the trunk of about half a cup of water. A week later, it happens again. The determination is made to surface, pop the hatch, clean the sealing surface and regrease the hatch O-ring.

I get tagged with this little job cuz I have the duty in deck division for the month. So, I put on a harness, got guys on the phones and we get permission to open the lower hatch. Open her up and it's all damp, yep the upper hatch is leaking. I tie off in the trunk, and get permission to pop the top hatch.

I open the hatch and immediatly start scrubbing the sealing surface. 30 seconds into it, I hear the OOD yelling from the flying bridge. As I look up to say, "what Sir?!?" a frickin green water monster flopps down on my head. Mind you, I'm standing over a 24 inch diameter "hole" in the people tank. I reach up and grap the hatch ring, pull it down and just spin my body hanging from the handle...

The word comes down asking if the hatch ring was clean and the O-ring regreased?.... NO:headshake. This time they tell me to shut the lower hatch before opening the top hatch... Ok... if this happens again, I'll be a worm attached to a 6800 ton anchor. I get the hatch open, sealing surface cleaned, O-ring regreased, and hatch secured at frickin light speed.

so after it's all over and done with, the OOD was on the mess decks getting a cup of coffee, he said, "son, that was the most amazing thing I've ever seen".

"how so Sir?"

He said, "The hatch was open, I saw a rogue wave approach and tried to warn you. I look down and the entire foredeck is awash. I see a solid sheet of water pouring down the foreward hatch. Then I see two hands stick up through the water, grab the hatch ring, and slam the hatch closed."


"yes Sir, It was pretty amazing from where I was at too, I was on the other end of those hands...."
 
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