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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
:thumbsup:Yesterday I was at my local Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit the Wonder Dog, and was in the checkout line when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant?

So since I'm laid off and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward, with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet, and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me.

I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's ass, and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack -- he was laughing so hard.
Wal-Mart won't let me shop there anymore.
 

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roflmao. you're too much.

last week i went to lunch & on the ride back it started raining. i walk in with wet shirt & pants & helmet & he asks if its raining. i just said, Nah the bike was dirty so i took it thru an automatic car wash!
 

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Discussion Starter #4
roflmao. you're too much.

last week i went to lunch & on the ride back it started raining. i walk in with wet shirt & pants & helmet & he asks if its raining. i just said, Nah the bike was dirty so i took it thru an automatic car wash!
:spit::crackup::lol:
 

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thats effin funny, the fact she believed is worse, and what i dont get is why the hell would wal mart kick you out because some tard believed it!!!!
 

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lol
 
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