Why Parents Drink - Kawasaki ZX-10R.net
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post #1 of 12 Old 10-10-2007, 11:28 AM Thread Starter
 
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Why Parents Drink

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed
was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope,
propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Dad."
With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands
and read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope
with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.
I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew
you would not approve of her because of all her piercings, tattoos, tight
motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am.

But it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant. Stacy said that we
will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of
firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more
children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday
I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your
grandchildren.

Love,
Your Son John

PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just wanted
to remind you that there are worse things in life than a report card That's
in my center desk drawer.

I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.
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post #2 of 12 Old 10-10-2007, 12:15 PM
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Originally Posted by Infiltrator View Post
A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed
was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope,
propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Dad."
With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands
and read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope
with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.
I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew
you would not approve of her because of all her piercings, tattoos, tight
motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am.

But it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant. Stacy said that we
will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of
firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more
children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday
I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your
grandchildren.

Love,
Your Son John

PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just wanted
to remind you that there are worse things in life than a report card That's
in my center desk drawer.

I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.
im gonna have to use that the next time i get a bad report card
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post #3 of 12 Old 10-10-2007, 01:07 PM
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I think thats a repost but its a good one, I wish Iwas that smart when I was in school I would have saved myself months of punishment.

"Never trade the thrill of living, for the security of existence"
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post #4 of 12 Old 10-10-2007, 01:10 PM
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"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." - Edmond Burke (1729-1797)
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post #5 of 12 Old 10-10-2007, 01:28 PM
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post #6 of 12 Old 10-10-2007, 03:11 PM
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post #7 of 12 Old 10-10-2007, 03:18 PM
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Life is too short injoy it!
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post #8 of 12 Old 10-20-2007, 02:13 PM
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My kids will be dead if they try anything like that...

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post #9 of 12 Old 10-20-2007, 02:25 PM
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this thread wins

That is the Curse of Speed which has plagued me all my life. I am a slave to it. On my tombstone they will carve, "IT NEVER GOT FAST ENOUGH FOR ME."
-Hunter S. Thompson
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post #10 of 12 Old 10-21-2007, 05:13 AM
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good one

Has anyone seen my marbles ?
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