The maid asked for a raise.
The lady of the house was very upset about this and asked: "Now Maria, why do you want an increase?"
Maria: "Well ma'am , there are three reasons why I want an increase. The first is that I iron better than you."
Lady: "Who said you iron better than me?"
Maria: "Your husband said so."
Lady: "Oh. And the second reason?"
Maria: "The second reason is that I am a better cook than you."
Lady: "Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than I?"
Maria: "Your husband did."
Maria: "My third reason is that I am a better lover than you."
Lady (very upset now): "Did that SOB of a husband of mine say that as well?"
Maria: "No ma'am, the gardener did.
She got the pay raise...