The koala bear & the lizard.
koala bear was smoking pot in a tree when a lizard came by.
The lizard smoked for a while with the koala bear then told the bear he was thirsty and was going to find some water.
He climbed down the tree to the river where he saw an alligator. The alligator was puzzled and asked why the lizard was drinking so much water.
"I just got done smoking pot with a koala bear!" - Replied the lizard.
"I gotta see this!" - Said the alligator as he walked over to the tree.
When the alligator started climbing to the koala, the bear shouts,
"HOW MUCH WATER DID YOU DRINK???"
"Be kind and courteous to everyone you come in contact with but have a plan to kill everyone you meet."