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post #1 of 3 Old 07-19-2007, 12:23 AM Thread Starter
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Animal Jokes

Does anyone know any good animal or pet jokes?
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post #2 of 3 Old 07-19-2007, 12:24 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by firemedic1343 View Post
Does anyone know any good animal or pet jokes?
I'll start off with one:

The Americans and Russians at the height of the arms race realized that if they continued in the usual manner they were going to blow up the whole world. One day they sat down and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dog fight. They'd have five years to breed the best fighting dog in the world. The losing side would have to lay down its arms.

The Russians found the biggest meanest Doberman and Rottweiler females in the world and bred them with the biggest meanest Siberian wolves. They selected only the biggest and strongest puppy from each litter, killed his siblings, and gave him all the milk. They used steroids and trainers and after five years came up with the meanest dog the world had ever seen. Its cage needed steel bars that were five inches thick and nobody could get near it.

When the day came for the dogfight, the Americans showed up with a strange animal. It was a nine foot long Dachshund. Everyone felt sorry for the Americans because they knew there was no way that this dog could possibly last ten seconds with the Russian dog.

When the cages were opened up, the Dachshund came out of its cage and slowly waddled over towards the Russian dog. The Russian dog snarled and got close enough to bite the Dachshund's neck. The Dachshund opened its mouth and consumed the Russian dog in one bite. There was nothing left at all of the Russian dog.

The Russians came up to the Americans shaking their heads in disbelief. "We don't understand how this could have happened. We had our best people working for five years with the meanest Doberman and Rottweiler females in the world and the biggest meanest Siberian Wolves."

"That's nothing," an American replied. "We had our best plastic surgeons working for five years to make an alligator look like a Dachshund."
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post #3 of 3 Old 07-19-2007, 03:39 AM
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A long nose, long tail, short legged water dog.... But in Australia we sometimes call them crockodiles


Bill - GI Pro, Hindle slip on, Smoked screen, ZX14 brakes.... Well, you feel lucky, punk? You shouldn't, this is a 10R
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