All engineers go to heaven - Kawasaki
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post #1 of 12 Old 05-30-2008, 04:41 PM Thread Starter
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All engineers go to heaven

About 9:30 on a friday night Bill the mechanical engineer was working on the gears for a draw bridge whent he pinion slipped and Bill was crushed...

Instantly Bill is standing among the clouds at the Pearly Gates and St. Peter greets him.

"welcome my son, what is your name"

"Bill Johnson, Mechanical Engineer"

St. Peter looks over the big book, and can't find Bill's name.

"Sorry Bill, you're not in the book"

"you sure, I thought all engnieers go to heaven".

"not in the book...", as St. Peter points to the elevator.

Bill gets in and takes the long ride down. The doors open and Bill is overcome by the heat, humitidy and sulfer stench...

he looks at one of the minions and asks, "is it ALWAYS like this?"

About a week later God is working in His office and He notices that all the guages for hell are reading wrong, Temp is a sublime 72'F, humitiy is a sweet 40%, and airborne noxious gasses are under 10ppm...

God mashes the intercom button to the Pearly Gates, "Peter, we have a problem, can you step into My office".

St. Peter comes in and asks what could possibly be wrong in heaven.

"you didn't by chance send an engineer down to hell sometime last week did you?"

"as a mater of fact we had a ME show up late friday... his name wasn't in the book Boss..."

"you know the rules, all engineers go to heaven, oh my son we are in a pickle now"

God gets on the red phone to hell and has the devil on the line.

"Louie, you didn't by chance get an engineer dropped off down there some time late last friday, did'ja?"

"why as a mater of fact, we did.

"well, just a little paperwork snafu, we are going to need him back, you know the rules"

"you are not getting Bill back...."

"What?! Bell, buddy, you have to send him back, the rules clearly state that all engineers go to heaven."

"Look, that Bill guy is amazing, he got the AC units working, told us we needed a scrubber, not even sure what that is but it takes the stink out of the air, he's working on the sewer system next week, forget it, you are not getting Bill back."

"Look, pal, you are in breach of contract, all engineers go to heaven, don't make me sue!!!!"

"Yeah, right.... where you gonna get a lawyer?"

Need to know how to install your Rifleman's 1/5th throttle insert? click me
For more info on a sticky grip (not enough cable slack) click me
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Originally Posted by Rifleman View Post
lol, once you go 1/5th... you NEVER go back

Last edited by Rifleman; 05-30-2008 at 04:45 PM.
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post #2 of 12 Old 05-31-2008, 02:44 PM
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post #3 of 12 Old 05-31-2008, 03:04 PM
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"You can have all the faith you want in spirits, and the afterlife, and heaven and hell, but when it comes to this world, don't be an idiot. Cause you can tell me you put your faith in God to put you through the day, but when it comes time to cross the road, I know you look both ways "Dr. Gregory House"
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post #4 of 12 Old 06-02-2008, 09:31 AM
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post #5 of 12 Old 06-02-2008, 09:59 AM
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post #6 of 12 Old 06-02-2008, 10:29 AM
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post #7 of 12 Old 06-02-2008, 10:29 AM
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good one.

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post #8 of 12 Old 06-02-2008, 12:22 PM
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post #9 of 12 Old 06-05-2008, 01:25 AM
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that was real good, i like it
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post #10 of 12 Old 06-05-2008, 04:23 AM
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Haha, I like that one! Me being a Mech Eng helps too!

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