Kim Jong....ILL errr. DEAD! - Kawasaki ZX-10R.net
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post #1 of 18 Old 12-19-2011, 12:34 PM Thread Starter
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Kim Jong....ILL errr. DEAD!

A small moment of silence for the death of a maniacal cruel tyrant of an oppressed people.... Now here comes part Deux!!

kIm jong facts

Wears oversized, tinted Elvis Presley-style sunglasses.
Almost always wears a jumpsuit. Almost always the same color.
Applauds whenever his army goosesteps past him.
Has been known to throw banquets that last for up to four days.
Once ordered his agents to kidnap South Korean director Shin Sang-Ok and actress wife Choi Eun-Hee to make propaganda films, including a revolutionary version of Godzilla.
Consumes more Hennessy VSOP congnac than anyone else in the world. Reportedly spends more than $650,000 a year to import his favorite elixir.
Once downed 10 glasses of wine during a meeting with South Korean President Kim Dae-jung.
Reportedly owns more than 20,000 films.
Has personally selected a group of young women he calls the Pleasure Brigade to provide his “home entertainment.”
His fear of flying is so extreme that he travels to Russia and China on a private train.
Claims to be an expert horseman although no evidence exists to prove it.
Claims he has a photographic memory and superhuman powers of recall.
Claims he shot a remarkable 11 holes in one during his first 18 holes of golf.
Has been accused of masterminding the 1983 assassination attempt on the South Korean President Chun Doo-hwan.
Millions of North Koreans starved to death as a result of Kim’s gross mismanagement of the rural economy.
Has only spoken nine words in public: “Glory to the heroic soldiers of the people’s army!”
Claims that when he was born, “a double rainbow appeared over the mountain and a new star formed in the skies.”
Once ordered five female disco dancers to strip, then ordered other North Korean officials to dance with them.
After being knocked unconscious in an equestrian accident, demanded that his administrative staff be injected with the same painkiller with which he was injected. He didn’t want to become the only one addicted to it.
Wears elevator shoes.
Wears a puffy pompadour.
Claims to have written 1,500 books — almost one per day – during his university years.
Eclectic taste in movies: Loves “The Godfather,” James Bond, “Friday the 13th,” Daffy Duck, and Elizabeth Taylor.
Once said of himself, “Small as a midget’s turd, aren’t I?”
Claims his election was so momentous that pear trees bloomed in autumn.
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BURNOUT.....
Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you.
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post #2 of 18 Old 12-19-2011, 01:09 PM
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LOL one less crazy ass tyrant in the world now....

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post #3 of 18 Old 12-19-2011, 01:34 PM
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LOL one less crazy ass tyrant in the world now....
Not really... just swapped him for his crazy ass son.

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post #4 of 18 Old 12-19-2011, 02:03 PM
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Read something interesting...

it is illegal for a picture of likeness of Kim Jong Il to touch the ground...

It is illegal for any person to touch propaganda.

so the South Koreans print propaganda on the back side of pictures of Kim and drop them on North Korea...

a picture of kim is on the ground, but it can not be touched because it is propaganda...

got to love the rules of dictators



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lol, once you go 1/5th... you NEVER go back
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post #5 of 18 Old 12-19-2011, 02:08 PM
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My favorite kim jong il law came while I was in korea 2000/2001. Only 3 hair cuts for men are allowed (of course one is the kim jong ill haircut), any other style is punishable by death! woot!!

I hope his son does something stupid to show how tough he is so we can carpet bomb everything. We need an excuse to use up all the old bombs anyway :D
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post #6 of 18 Old 12-19-2011, 02:39 PM
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post #7 of 18 Old 12-19-2011, 03:37 PM
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Saw this post earlier today and was laughing my ass off. Nice to see another Chiver too - KCCO Garth!
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post #8 of 18 Old 12-19-2011, 03:37 PM
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^^^ I'm addicted to that damn site!!!
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post #9 of 18 Old 12-19-2011, 03:44 PM
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^^^ I'm addicted to that damn site!!!
Lol. Same here man - just got my Chive bean bag boards in the mail today and Chive shirts are supposed to arrive tomorrow
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post #10 of 18 Old 12-19-2011, 03:45 PM
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NICE! I always miss out when they have stuff in stock, I did get a calendar tho lol.
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