Funny little bit....
So I'm driving around enjoying the scenery and as usual I'm doing "slightly" better than the speed limit. As I cross over a bridge I look back to see a cop tucked back behind the railing. Sure enough, here comes the lights and I pull over. Standard license and registration stuff. Here's where it gets good.
"Where you going in such a hurry?"
"Actually officer, I'm on my way to work."
"What do you do that is so important?"
"Well, I'm a rectum stretcher."
"A what? Come again?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher"
" I got to hear this. How does that work?"
"Well, first I work in one finger, then a second and so on until I've got one hand in. Then I start with the other hand. Once I get both hands in I just start pulling and stretching and pulling until its about six feet."
"You mind telling me what the hell you do with a six foot arsehole?"
"You give him a radar gun and stick him behind a bridge."
look on the cops face = PRICELESS
(the above is not a true story)
If you're not living on the edge, your taking up too much space!